Lance Risko had jumped bail and it was my job to get him in cuffs and in front of a judge… again. My name is Stephanie Peach and I’m a bond control officer in Hoboken, New Jersey. That’s right, a bounty hunter. The only problem with this assignment was that I needed to find him first. Lola as usual had an idea, and, as usual, it involved either eating donuts or gambling. In this case both.
“I need a box of Buttercream maple bars if I’m goin’ to figure this scheme out, but I think if we go to Lance’s Atlantic City Casino and lose a lot at blackjack, we can make a stink and get pulled up to the manager’s office. I’ll distract him and you get into his phone and find out where Risko is hiding out.”
Seemed like as good a plan as any, put wouldn’t you know it, when we got to the blackjack table, I just kept winning. First deal I got an ace and an 8. Now I’m no genius, but I know you don’t ask for a hit on 19, but I figured I’d stick to the plan. A 2 of hearts. Shit I won. Then next deal a 7 of hearts and a 6 of clubs. I stay. The dealer busts. Then I get a queen of diamonds and a king of clubs. Hit me I say. An Ace of Diamonds. And this is how the night went. And then the free drinks start comin’. Finally, this sommelier type comes up and asks if I want a bottle of their finest wine for my friend and me.
“Sure”, I say, “do you have the Complant Chardonnay. “
He says, “ma’am, you have excellent taste. As a matter of fact the 2020 has just arrived. I’ll be right back with a bottle and two glasses.”
Anyway, I’m up 5 big at midnight and I’m thinkin’, hey screw the body receipt, I think I’ll just cash out. That’s when I sense a shadow looming over me and realize that one of Risko’s goons, a certain Bubba Stark, is sidling up behind me and I feel a hard object sticking into my ribs through his shark skin suit jacket.
“Clearly that’s not a banana and clearly, you’re not happy to see me” I quip
“And neither is Mister Risko. The boss wants to see ya upstairs alone,” he mutters.
“At least let a lady finish her glass of Chardonnay,” I counter, my hand only shaking a little
“Is that the 2020 Complant? Why the wife and me had it last night. It’s got a light straw yellow color and a nose of white flowers, apple blossoms, lychee, lime zest and a hint of camembert rind. On the entry, notes of crisp lime zest give way to a lightly creamy mid-palate with flavors of honey, caramel, lily and alyssum. It has a long finish ending with a refreshing note of acidity. Yeah go ahead and enjoy, I have a feeling it’ll be the last nice thing to happen to you for awhile.”
Well, I figure if I was going to go down at least it would be with the taste of a great wine on my tongue. That’s when Lola pulled out her baretta and started firing. As we ran for the exit, I reached over and grabbed that bottle with the apple blossom on it. No way I’m leaving that behind. The 5 K, I’ll get another time.